A man walks into a coffee shop at noon after a difficult morning at the office. He is stressed and there is a lot for him to complete before the end of the work day. He decides to take his full lunch hour to reset and he does this by striking up a conversation with the barista about cars. After 30 minutes of conversation and an exchange of some jokes, he leaves the café feeling reenergized and renewed. That is the power of a good conversation.
Conversation is a natural part of the human experience. We all desire to speak and communicate with others and it is an essential part of our survival. To perform tasks and engage in teamwork requires us to have good communication and conversational skills. However, conversation does so much more than just fulfil the base need of survival. It is through conversation that we get the opportunity to explore our perspectives, opinions and ideas and to challenge or reaffirm our beliefs, and this process can be therapeutic.
In my opinion good conversation is a therapy that we all need. Whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, we all crave conversations that challenge us and give us the opportunity to think through what we believe. Good conversation can be relaxing and refreshing especially when people have a unique perspective on complex issues. Imagine a life without quality conversation. A life like that can lead to stagnation and unhappiness. Good conversation is important. It can fertilize our minds once it encourages us to think outside the box.
How do we engage in good conversation? In my opinion, the most important thing is to learn to ask the right questions. Socrates believed in the power of asking the right questions. This helps to get the conversation moving and gives people the opportunity to share their perspectives and understandings, but it also does something much deeper, it gives you the chance to internalize the questions being asked and to engage in an active analysis of your own perspective and the perspective of the other person or people in the conversation. To many, the right question is more important than the correct answer.
The second thing is to listen twice as much as you speak. Even if you are a
talker, implementing this helps you to give space for the conversation to
breathe and for others to share which is extremely important. If you speak too much, then you may miss a vital piece of information that can change your perspective on something. Active listening is an important skill in good conversation and it helps the other person to feel as if their contribution is appreciated and valued.
Lastly, I recommend taking a moment to reflect before speaking. Very often we respond immediately after someone is finished speaking and taking a few moments to reflect or contemplate on what has been shared is important. It helps us to organize our thoughts before responding and can help us to maintain a good flow in the conversation.
I believe that good conversation is a therapy that we all need. Life is filled
with many perspectives and many people have very interesting ways and methods of viewing the world. Someone once told me that one of the best ways to learn something new is to converse.
Strike up a conversation today!
